My 2017 Complete Movie List: #70 – #61

Now, here are the movies that came in at #70 – #61 on my complete movie list for 2017. Expect to see the white version of ‘Girls Trip’, a movie I thought was going to ruin my childhood and more.

 

70. Despicable Me 3

  • This has to be the ‘Despicable Me’ movie where the minions were used the least
  • Trey Parker voicing the villain was the best part of the movie
  • Why haven’t Gru’s (Steve Carell) girls aged yet?
  • Feels like I’m getting old because some of the jokes I would have laughed at before wasn’t working on me this time around
    • Or maybe the movie just wasn’t that funny
  • My least favorite of the ‘Despicable Me’ movies
  • To Sum it Up: The franchise as a whole seems to have fatigue so it’s probably time to call it a wrap

69. Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie

  • A true kids’ movies because of its childish jokes and just its all-around ridiculousness
  • All the voice actors did a commendable job
  • I can’t compare it to its source material because I barely remember it
  • I was expecting something more fantasy like
    • I thought Captain Underpants would actually come out the book the kids wrote
    • So, I didn’t necessarily like that the hypnotized principal became the hero at the snap of a finger
  • I wasn’t a fan of the open ending, but it did leave room for sequels if that’s what you want
    • It did it too blatantly for me
  • To Sum it Up: I have plenty of childishness in me so I enjoyed the movie to a point. Not something I would rewatch though

68. Rough Night

  • Odd combination of actresses and the movie did nothing to change that thought
    • Their chemistry didn’t seem genuine and it affected to humor
  • Wanted to laugh more but plenty of jokes came up short. I’m talking “no laughs from anyone around me” short
  • I’m a big Scarlett Johansson fan but I don’t want to see her leading a comedy again because she wasn’t all that funny
  • I hate how the end of the movie did away with the murder, that the plot revolved around, so easily
    • I should be used to it by now with comedies but this time it irked me
      • Probably because I didn’t love what I saw up until that point
    • To Sum it Up: Funny movie but it had way too many jokes that got no laughs, not even a chuckle, from me or anyone in the theater

67. Sleepless

  • Why was Jamie Foxx like a shy Christian Bale Batman the whole time
  • T.I. was barely in the movie but thank goodness because his acting was wack
  • Bryant (Michelle Monaghan) was annoying
  • Vincent’s (Foxx) son was very worthless in the fight scenes he was a part of
  • How was Vincent able to keep fighting all night when he kept showing that his stab wound was really bothering him?
  • Vincent clearly wanted to get caught by the “bad guys” because every time he had a step on them, he kept stopping smh
  • Very predictable twist with which cop was dirty
  • The plot was messy because why Vincent was undercover and his real intentions during the that case weren’t clearly stated
    • The whole thing with the drugs weren’t either
  • That’s funny; They tried to sort of set up a sequel at the end…ha ha ha
  • To Sum it Up: All complaints aside, the movie kept moving and was somewhat entertaining so I’m not too mad at it

66. Fist Fight

  • The funniest scene dealt with a Big Sean song and a talent show
  • The big, anticipated fight was entertaining but I’m just glad it actually happened in the ridiculous manner that it did and not not happen for a lazy reason I feared the movie would come up with
  • Christina Hendricks is the worse at picking movies with a role that has any use to the story. So disappointed in her
  • Once again, here is a movie with bloopers that aren’t funny
  • To Sum it Up: Wasn’t anywhere close to being as funny as I thought it would be but it does offer some sort of entertainment for its hour and a half

65. Power Rangers

  • Movie opened up with a low brow joke about touching a cow. That’s an odd way to start out a Power Rangers movie.
    • I know they wanted it to be more universal action movie than just it being directed at kids but jeez
  • I’m going to assume that the stones that the would Rangers found near the beginning saved them from dying after getting hit by the train
    • If that’s the case, then I still think that’s stupid
  • Glad it was shown the rangers somewhat learning how to fight instead of automatically giving them that skill
  • Ludi Lin, who plays Zack, showed some awful acting abilities
    • Becky G, who was Trini, wasn’t that good sometimes as well
  • Had some overly dramatic, sappy teen drama
  • Billy (RJ Cyler) dies by drowning (I think) at some point in the movie but it doesn’t make sense to me because earlier in the movie he held his breath under water a lot longer
  • Hmmm…I saw Jason (Dacre Montgomery) knew how to use things with his suit with no explanation
  • The Power Ranger theme song placement in the third act felt dumb and didn’t fit with the vibe they were trying to create with this movie
    • Should have done some sort of rendition of it though
  • The movie got worse when the action finally came towards the end
    • Once the big battle was over, the movie wrapped up sooooooo fast
  • Of the cast, Elizabeth Banks, Cyler and Bill Hader were the standouts
  • The story tried to touch on why the kids felt like outcast the message didn’t connect like I know they wanted it to
  • To not get to specific but some small details in the movie didn’t make sense so that annoyed me
  • Had that nostalgic feel at times
  • I needed more action and when I did get action, I need for it to seem like more of a priority AND more care
  • To Sum it Up: I expected a lot worse but I didn’t expect to enjoy the origin story portion of the movie more than I enjoyed the lackluster action

64. Baywatch

  • From the opening ‘Baywatch’ logo, you can tell the effects are going to be do-do
  • A trash David Hasselhoff cameo
  • The plot plays out like a novice screenwriter developed it
    • Trying to make the details realistic isn’t a priority
    • The progress of the investigation process is so forced. How clues are found and how leads are made are not believable in the slightest
  • Thought Ronnie (Jon Bass) would have been more apart of the comedy seeing how he’s the out-of-shape lifeguard
    • That usually is a clear indication that you’ll be the butt of the jokes and create the jokes
  • Why did Summer (Alexandra Daddario) and Stephanie disappear when the end action was going down?
    • Not a good look for a movie that wanted the women to be more apart of the plot then just sideline characters
  • I laughed but it was almost because I just wanted to and not because it genuinely made me do it
  • Weak tongue-in-cheek references
  • To Sum it Up: If Dwayne Johnson, Zac Efron and Daddario weren’t in this movie, I wouldn’t have any like for it

63. Wind River

  • Jon Bernthal, the king of being in a movie way less than he should, lived up to his title again
  • Slow but tense
    • The slowness overpowered it though
  • The cold air was more vicious than the guns so why do people live anywhere near there?
  • The ultimate crime was very realistic but it wasn’t as interesting, nor was the investigation, as you would hope or the attempted feel of the movie made you think
  • Taylor Sheridan is a great screenwriter but this isn’t his best work
  • To Sum it Up: If only the story was as good as the movie was intense

62. Alien: Covenant 

  • Maggie (Amy Seimetz) was a complete idiot when she locked the one girl and sick dude in that one room…yes I know that was super descriptive
  • Michael Fassbender gave the best performances, in dual roles, as the psychotic David and Walter
  • The set pieces and look of the movie give credence to it being watched on the big screen
  • The need to better explain early on who is married to who in the crew
  • On it’s own, the movie treaded a very similar path as its predecessor, ‘Prometheus’, but just had a different species as the antagonist so that brought things down
  • Cool flick that gives you something less than what the long build up promises
  • To Sum it Up: A step up from ‘Prometheus’ with the action, violence and look

61. The House

  • Funny over-the-top fight scene with Martha (Lennon Parham) and Laura (Andrea Savage) at the house
  • How easy the home casino got started was ridiculous especially when it came to selling the idea to people in the town
  • Jeremy Renner’s cameo was soooo short. He literally was there for like a minute, barely said anything and, oh yeah, was a mobster
  • Wasn’t a fan of the middle of the movie when the casino was getting successful
  • Amy Poehler was kind of invisible (which is saying something because she is a talented comedic actress) and Will Ferrell (the legend) was noticed but barely
  • The end felt like they wanted to hurry up and end it so they rushed through the points they had to hit without any sort of danger being felt
  • To Sum it Up: Poor plot that tries its hardest to take away from the fact that this is a funny movie

 

My 2017 Complete Movie List: #80 – #71My 2017 Complete Movie List: #60 – #51

 

(Photo Credit: Shamus Kelley – http://www.denofgeek.com/us/movies/power-rangers/262911/power-rangers-movie-deleted-scenes-planned-for-blu-ray; Top Gun Trav – http://redcarpetrefs.com/captain-underpants-the-first-epic-movie-trailer-video/; Rohan Naahar –  https://www.hindustantimes.com/movie-reviews/alien-covenant-movie-review-twice-the-michael-fassbender-twice-the-terror/story-Z9Mz8y2dOgcj2A7FW2zXWL.html)

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